It’s not that I can’t. The problem is that when I’m with someone, I deeply yearn to be alone. I’d love to have my life for myself, with no responsibility with no one else - just me.

But then, when I’m alone, I feel like a failure, like I need a relationship to feel complete, and I fucking hate that. So I end up in another relationship, and after two years I can’t stand it anymore, and the cycle repeats.

What the hell. Has anyone suffered from something like that? How can you be alone and not feel lonely? How to kill this need to be with someone?

EDIT: Thanks for all the answers, I’m taking every single one into consideration. Please, keep them coming.

  • NeoNachtwaechter@lemmy.world
    5·
    7 months ago

    like I need a relationship to feel complete,

    That is normal.

    I repeat: that is the normal thing.
    Humans are like that. Humans need other humans.

    and I fucking hate that.

    Please don’t hate it. And please don’t hate yourself.

    I feel like a failure,

    Same: Please don’t. Don’thate yourself. You are a perfectly normal human being.

    So I end up in another relationship, and after two years I can’t stand it anymore, and the cycle repeats.

    I suspect some mistakes somewhere in that cycle. Humans make mistakes. All humans do. Maybe forgiving helps.