cross-posted from: https://lemmy.world/post/17911181

It’s not true, folks. The lying liberal media wants you to think he’d shag a settee. That he’d bone a book stand. That he’s creamied on the credenza.

Don’t trust them. My beautiful boy JD, he’d never do it! He’s chaste with the chaises. He’s never loved a loveseat.

My VP would never fuck furniture.

  • Got_Bent@lemmy.world
    17·
    4 months ago

    I had to go looking for some context as this was new to me. I found this picture and laughed out loud in public

    • pete_the_cat@lemmy.worldEnglish
      51·
      4 months ago

      For others wondering: in his book he admitted to fucking a rubber glove that was stuck in the couch somehow.

      • Maven (famous)@lemmy.zipOPM
        15·
        4 months ago

        He didn’t actually say it in his book. It was a joke that turned into a widespread rumor but it doesn’t mention fucking a couch a single time in the book…

        That being said… There no way to prove that he DIDN’T fuck the couch. He just didn’t write about it in his book.

  • MeaanBeaan@lemmy.world
    4·
    3 months ago

    The funniest thing to me is that they think we actually believe it to be true. These memes are hilarious because he just feels like a couch fucker. Regardless of whether or not he has fucked a couch he definitely gives off the vibe.