Does anyone else feel this way or did when they first self-diagnosed?
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It’s hard not to feel that way when all my life I felt different from other people
I’m at a stage where I definitely have this in the back of my head. Considering how I’ve always felt excluded, different, got bullied, etc…I developed a strong inclination for the underdog. I prefer diverse settings with authentic people that show their differences proudly. I feel uncomfortable in settings where people conform and appear very similar. I also do not like competitive environments, rather I prefer collaborative ones. This clashes with my underlying us vs. them mentality, but it’s hard to not have that mentality when they create it.
I don’t go to places and think, “OMG, my people are better, and those people are different and suck.” They’re the ones that labelled us autistic, disabled, and weird. They’re the ones that find the marginalized people to bully when they feel inadequate with themselves. So, my divisions is more of a protective factor because they’re the ones that create the divide, and we need to survive. In the end, the “us” in my head are the collaborative, authentic, compassionate people, and the “them”, are the ones that create division, antagonism, competition, and hate. I’m aware of the hypocrisy, but it’s just a necessary outcome of the system…unless anyone else knows of another way.
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Oh yeah, I definitely feel this. I’m self-diagnosed a few months ago
us v. them doesn’t apply here that much, because neurodivergent people are different from neurotypical people but are even more different than other neurodivergents. It is not us v. them, it is “I” v. them (nts) and them and them and them (other nds)…
I don’t think it’s a healthy way to think. I also think that if you feel very tribalistic about something that you are choosing to identify with yourself in the absence of any professional help, you might want to look into professional help options, because it’s a demonstration that you cannot be impartial to yourself (no one can)
Well…it is a bit like us-vs-them. I’m all for modifying my behavior to make people comfortable around me, I’m willing to change, but it often feels like (1) nothing is ever enough, and (2) they’re often unwilling to make any similar changes to accommodate us. And I do think that we need to organize based on our shared experience as neurodiverse people to defend ourselves from the weird expectations that NT people often expect from us.
That being said, NT people are not a monolith, and obviously there are lots of cool and reasonable NT people. But there are some things that they just can’t intuitively understand because they’re not in our skins. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with informing them of that, just as there’s nothing wrong with NT people informing us about things we might be unable to intuitively understand.
