I don’t like being referred to as a “person with autism”. I can’t just set it down, it’s not something I can remove. It is fundamental to the way I interact with the world, right down to how stim enters my brain. If my brain has types of inputs no allistic person can even approach, and methods of processing inherently different, it is an existence no allistic person can reach. There is no version of me that is not autistic.
A “cure” is the same as shooting me and replacing me with someone else.
The type of person I am is autistic. I am autistic.
I know it is a big trend in anarchist spaces to use person first language, but in many situations that just sounds like eugenics to me. Personhood is not some distinct universal experience. There is no “ideal human mind” floating out there in the aether for them to recognize in me.
I get that person first language helps some people recognize that thoughts happen behind my eyes, but if the only way they can do that is by imagining I’m them, I don’t care.
I’m getting it on the NHS, so if I ask for a new therapist it might be a 6 month wait, just to get another one who’s maybe clueless about autism related anxiety too. I’ll try to ask this one to spend a bit of time learning. If she still doesn’t then I’ll see what the procedure is if I want to switch therapists.
In other news, my GP is helping me get an assessment referral and he said the waiting list is closer to 18 months than three years.