Welcome to the Melbourne Community Daily Discussion Thread.
It has been 4 weeks since we had to help our little dog sleep for the last time. We had 18 extra healthy and happy months with him because of chemotherapy… when we were told to expect a couple of weeks if we didn’t get chemo. It comes and goes in waves but I miss his tiny little furry body and his chatter. We made those 18 months count, he even went on a 2 week roadtrip adventure with us when we drove to WA
Image: A smiling Pomeranian pleased with his new haircut.It’s so hard when they must leave, but not having their joy in our lives is insufferable. Best wishes to you.
Thank you… especially when he was so loud and had such a big personality. We have an almost 14y/o Kelpie who is super chill and very quiet so the little dog’s absence is very noticeable. We have discovered the Kelpie only barked because the Pom instigated it lol. The postie can now enter undetected.
What a lovely pup! It’s the toughest time, especially when we fight so hard for them to stay with us.
Thank you so true. He was the life of the party - like the very loud, first time wasted kind of mate who you love anyway 😊
He sounds like a bit of a character, and they make the hole left behind so much bigger 🐕
What a beautiful little guy ❤ We will never have enough time with them. I hope you’re taking care of yourself.
Thank you… He was very cute. He got a thrill out of being a pest and loved a good prank, especially involving toilet paper and underpants ☺️ our furry friends could live our entire lives and if still wouldn’t be enough. We were lucky to have this little guy in our lives for almost 12 years. He only did things he wanted to do so we seek a bit of solace in knowing he only would have chosen this moment because he was ready ❤️
Good morning all!
Thankyou all for your responses yesterday, they were too many and varied in nature to respond to individually in the detail I would have liked to give, but thankyou for taking the time and for your support.
I arrived home last night to be greeted by a very humbled, remorseful and apologetic Mr Peeler. The fine gave him a big shock, and when I saw it I could see why. A good mate of his had ripped into him about it before I got home, saying 2 kmph more and he would have lost his licence and gotten an $800 fine… and then I probably would have pretty understandable grounds for a separation.
He has been seeing a psychologist about his depression & anxiety, which he was considering discontinuing due to the emotions it was dredging up. It was on the way home from one of these sessions that the speeding occurred. At my insistence he will continue the therapy and discuss what has happened and talk more productively about strategies to manage those feelings, but take time out after the session and sit in the park or take a walk before he gets behind the wheel, take time to decompress.
Today he will arrange for installments to be taken out of his fortnightly money, and I made it clear that, given all the other support ihave already given I am drawing the line very firmly on this one.
I also made it clear how disgusted I was about the drink before picking up the kids, and he knew given the circumstances there was no point arguing. The friend he visited is a flagrant alcoholic with a death wish, and he can visit that person after he’s dropped the kids at home or on the weekend, but absolutely not during the day. He also needs to discuss this with the therapist. Visiting this guy is like a trap, everyone ends up drinking there. It’s why I don’t visit him anymore either, and I used to count him as a friend.
Finally, I asked if he felt I was being unreasonable in any of this, and he said no. I then told him that, given he agreed its fair and reasonable, if any of these things are not done, then I will end the relationship. Let’s see how it goes.
Oh by the way I did my exercises, day 26 and I think 9 or 10 of tummy, I lost track. And I’m still off the grog. Have a lovely day everyone!
I also made it clear how disgusted I was about the drink before picking up the kids, and he knew given the circumstances there was no point arguing. The friend he visited is a flagrant alcoholic with a death wish, and he can visit that person after he’s dropped the kids at home or on the weekend, but absolutely not during the day. He also needs to discuss this with the therapist. Visiting this guy is like a trap, everyone ends up drinking there. It’s why I don’t visit him anymore either, and I used to count him as a friend.
Good on you for trying to move forward. I’m not sure i could given this. Battling mental health I can stick with, shooting yourself in the foot whilst you already wounded I can not. Dont expect him to pull himself up by his boot straps, but I would expect him to avoid triggers.
That spiral of self sabotage is a real dark and slippery one. Especially with brains that gravitate towards self destruction to deal with overwhelming emotions such as stuff dredged up after therapy. But I agree, others have gotta draw a line at people going out of the way to get sucked into that vortex, especially when such actions directly impact the safety and welfare of dependents. Guy needs to be more forthright about his tendencies and get help on how to hold space after therapy/emotional spirals.
Good on you for being clear and firm!! Sending you gentle love ❤️
I am so proud of you for standing your ground on this. Sending you love and good vibes, girl! 💜💜💜
Amazing stuff on the exercises too!! 🥰🥰
You have handled this with a level of dignity, clarity and patience that I wouldn’t have been able to manage, especially with kids in the picture. May you continue to access that strength and groundedness for whatever comes next.
Buckets of care in whichever form you would prefer it.
Good on you, it sounds like you’ve dealt with the situation really well. Fingers crossed for both your sakes that he takes the opportunity to improve himself.
Well done sister! I’m glad he’s trying to get better. He’d do well to avoid said friend until he stops drinking. AA has helped me realise how alcohol is at the core of so many problems. Other people’s drinking can have terrible repercussions on those around them.
Alcohol really messes your brain up in ways it is really hard to see when being influenced by it. I’m at about 18 months sober, and in hindsight I can really see how much of my depression and other problems was being caused by the alcohol, but at the time I really could not see it. So i spent years stuck in this endless spiral of drinking to relieve the depression and anxiety, which was being mostly fueled by the alcohol. I knew I should stop drinking, but trying to deal with the depression without it seemed impossible.
I only managed to stop because I told myself it was temporary - just a few weeks so I didn’t have the covid vaccine side effects at the same time, then a couple of weeks more because it was nearly Christmas and I didn’t want to be hungover at the family gathering. Then I aimed for three months because some articles said that’s how long it took to reverse most of the damage of long term drinking. I guess they were right, because by then I was not feeling like I needed to drink to deal with things.
Great work. I needed help from aa but have reached the same conclusions. A lot of shitty positions I found myself in, poor life outcomes and terrible decisions I made were due to alcohol. I have no idea if I could have stayed sober without aa but doing it alone has not worked in the past. I’d have long sober periods but always ended up having another bender. I’m only just over a month sober this time and finally my anxiety has abated. It really fucks with me. Getting a thorough organ health check next month. Hopefully I didn’t do too much damage this time.
Interview done, I think it went well. Even if it didn’t, I was still cute so it’s fine (im trying to be positive about my looks ugh).
Cousin invited me to go to the european food market thingy tonight, so I suddenly have Friday night plans yay!!
You smashed it out if the park. They going to offer you 15k more than Ur asking to make sure they got u
Manifest that for me, and I’ll think of something nice to gift you 😉😅
Plz be a potato
What else could it have possibly been 👀 🥔
A whole bag of potat? 7 bucks
Bag’o’Potat is the reward for the manifesting to manifest 😉
You got this! Good luck to you. I hope you get a reply by mid next week
It’s surreal thinking about cousins being friends. I see my cousins maybe at Christmas and then at the occasional funeral or wedding. It sounds nice though.
I wish we were closer, but I’m an only child and they are the eldest of 3 siblings. So they’re close to each other, tho the middle one just moved interstate. We’re the kids of 2 of 4 siblings as well, so Sunday lunch at nanandopas has always had aunts, uncle, and a subset of cousins.
I do see them individually, as mates, occasionally. This is one of those occasions.
Yeah. I rarely see then but it only used to be every so often so I’m not sure what it would have been like to have been really close with family.
Maybe not with my cousins specifically but maybe it would have been nice to have spent more time with some members of my family doing things.
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Yay. Hoping for some good news
Also enjoy the Friday night plans and have fun.
Cool andd good luck. 🤞🏻
Hope for the best, expecting the worst is what I always say.
Yeee i try to live by that, but the depression usually tips it over to “i am the worst”.
But it’s a bastard-man, and a liar, hahah
It’s always annoying whenever you tell people that and they’re always like “don’t think like that!”. But when you have so many interviews and get nothing… you can’t help but think that.
But hey, I believe in you, you’ll get it <3
It’s fucking demeaning when people tell you how to think. Seriously. Intrusive thoughts are very hard to deal with without being condescended to by people close to us.
Good luck! I hope you get the job, and in these situations I tell myself that at least it’s interview practise if I don’t get it
Oooh I forgot that was on
Fingers and toes crossed for you!
City thoughts: it smells like cigarettes and it makes me want one gorram it.
Men with long hair, and ponytails 😍🤤
Women are beautiful 😍🤤
Firefly/Serenity fan?
Also thankfully the cig smell isn’t all the time (at least for me today, other side of city)
I’m a fan of Nathan Fillion. Does that count?
Yessum it counts
Big Firefly/Serenity fan. Huge. Not a fan of Joss, just most of the media he stuck his fingers into/created lol
Shows great some of the actors and him not much. Also a fan obvs because I asked you 😅
2am elizabeth st. maccas for a true cross section of society.
That, and elizabeth st Hungry Jacks. Or swanston and elizabeth anytime during the AMs on a Friday and Saturday night 😅
Is your interview happening soon?
Look what my daughter bought me.
Image of 3 Snoopy face washers.
I ♥ Snoopy
I love him. 💗
The cutest and fluffiest!
Oooh these are so cute!!!
Awww!
Was gonna head out to a gig but I’m not travelling 1.5hrs each way by PT only to buy an $11 melbourne bitter and pretend everything is okay.
Instead I’m doing sushi.
Normally we drink Pure Blondes but tonight we thought we’d give Aldi’s Natural Blondes a go and it’s turned out to be a big big fucking no no. It tastes like it’s been filtered through hay. Luckily we have back ups. This is a PSA. Don’t make the same mistake guys.
Quite a few in agreement with you according to this review site (not sure why it’s in the cider category?). I tried the Rivet lager before and was disappointed.
The after taste wasn’t bad but the first bit was like dried grass clippings.
Sounds very yucky. Don’t like any of my drinks filter through grass or hay.
Yeah nah. It wasn’t good.
5 days. Bots going strong
I have conferred with the bot, who says today marks a full week of successful posting. Good work, bot! 🎉
It has done well, and you too. Thank you
Hugs and sympathies to all those feelin a bit down tonight. Seems like there’s a few that need a Friday night under the covers watching tv. Look after yourselves.
I’m starting to get sick of online communities (present company excluded) - namely how much people are willing to complain about something while continually consuming it. Two recent cases come to mind:
- Diablo IV - people were upset with Blizzard that it was online only, and then they were upset about it being so heavily monetised, then they were upset with its recent updates (sending the user score on Metacritic below 5). And yet they STILL continue to play it, constantly. Blizzard won’t give a shit about your complaints if people are still consuming it.
and
- Reddit - particularly, the new r/Places that has opened up. The complaints in there about how it seems that bots are destroying the very essence of the “game”, and that mods are sabotaging anything against u/spez… as if they didn’t think this would happen anyway after the last few months. And yet people still continually use the platform.
Perhaps more people will leave when constantly bombarded with whinging commentary on the reddits. I still try and recruit now and then on Reddit through various techniques.
I need to get myself out of the habit of defaulting to Reddit. I use it for some news sources on particular areas I love, but ultimately maybe 12% of the content is useful while the rest is just rage bait, or click bait, or our-right false information. If others want to keep using Reddit then fine, but I really need to take a good hard look at what benefit I actually get from it.
It is not just online platforms. I have quite a few people at work who will constantly complain that the conditions are dreadful compared to everywhere else, who seem to believe they could earn more money stacking shelves at the supermarket or doing some other “easier” job. And yet they have been working there for years and show no signs they ever plan to leave.
Those racist people who complain that immigrants and First Australians get privileges and all the government money
but when challenged, when asked if they would swap places, they say no.
And prisoners - they apparently have such a wonderful time in there it astounds me that these people aren’t going out and committing crimes so they can get in on the easy life too. Strangely the same people seemed to be very upset at how horribly restricted they were when told to stay within 5km from home for a few months.
God, isn’t the the truth. Everyone has a soap box (and I realise the irony give my complaint), and seems like complaining about certain things while doing absolutely nothing about it is not only a right but a responsibility.
People complaining about Diablo IV while continuing to play it are fucking idiots. You’re right, Acti-Blizz won’t change anything as long as people keeping playing and paying. It shits me up the wall, Stephanie Sterling fucking called it years ago, that microtransactions were awful and would become a cancer, and it has. I am tired of Acti-Blizz games, I am tired of fanboys defending Acti-Blizz; if they weren’t going to boycott bc of the sexual harassment issues in the company, then they were never going to boycott over MX.\
Ugh!
I bought Dave the Diver last night and was having a blast with it. I switched over to Rimworld after a spell and had more fun. Then I realised I’m having so much fun with these more “indie” titles, and that things like Diablo IV are purely FOMO when it comes to wanting the game. I think it’s an exercise in avoiding the online hype (although in saying that, holy shit Baldurs Gate 3 looks fucking incredible).
Also, fuck MXs. The day they became an industry standard was the day AAA videogames took a turn for the worse.
I haven’t look too closely into Diablo 4 despite being a huge fan of the previous entries but the slippery slope could be seen with Diablo 3 then the Immortals game.
No surprise that they’ll fine a way to generate income beyond the game release itself.
Ok but i reserve the right to scream vile invectives at this damned lynel colosseum
So update on the unplanned emergency chips I did last night.
Didn’t have white vinegar to put in the water for parboiling so subbed with apple cider vinegar and it was the same.
Also chicken and cashew is a good emergency main even if you don’t have cashews.
I prefer cider for most purposes aside from cleaning. 🤷🏻♀️
I knew this day would happen. Forgot my ADHD meds at home, so now I’m feeling very… Not focused. Ugh.
Good thing it’s not too busy at work I suppose.
I’ve got just over 2 full days left before the big move. It’s a lot easier to cope with now that I’ve been to the house a few times, know it’s not a shithole and I’ve met the lead tenant mentor people and know they’re alright. I’m still a bit annoyed by the whole being forced to move in before I’m ready thing, but I’m trying not to think about it too much because it’s kinda just a waste of energy and emotion
There’s 1 other kid there at the moment, and he was meant to move to a different place today, but then the supreme beings of child protection changed the date yesterday, because of course they did. So my move in was pulled a week forward, and his move-out was pushed a week back, but from what I’ve been told (I haven’t been able to meet him), he seems chill and does stuff most of the day, so things should be alright. But if worse comes to worse, he’s only there for 4 days after I move in anyway
Best of luck. Hope this is the start of a great new chapter in your life.
Thanks hongo, I appreciate it
Seems promising! Is your furniture going to fit?
I hope so. I got to pick out all new furniture for this place, so I’m not taking the furniture from my current place. I also get 2 bedrooms rather than just 1, though they are on the smaller side. I think it should fit though
Oh sweet, two bedrooms?? Is that going to be like a bedroom plus study or what’s the plan
Yeah, I was planning on turning the 2nd one into a sort of private living room for having people over. I was going to chuck a workbench for my various electronic tinkering projects and a bookshelf and couch for a bit of atmosphere. It will all fit, but it’s more about positioning things without it feeling cramped
Hi, have seen some of your posts and hope you’re ok. Is it ok if I ask what you mean by being forced to move? What kind of living arrangement needs a tenant mentor, and what is a mentor? Maybe I have missed some of your updates but also I don’t mean to ask anything intrusive. Just hoping to increase my understanding of the system.
Oh, please don’t apologise. It’s okay. A small part of the reason why I do share my updates here is to educate people a little, and I could yammer on about this for the rest of the night. I’m not sure exactly which of my posts you’ve seen, and how much you already know about the system, so forgive me if I say some things you already know
Basically I currently live in residential care, so rather than living with my parents I live in state care (it’s essentially a modernised and lower capacity version of an orphanage). There are workers here 24/7 who do most things, cooking, cleaning, washing, dishes, etc, etc.
Lead tenant is for people in residential (or in some cases, kinship/foster care) care 16+ to essentially act as a transition from residential care (where everything is done for you) and total independence (18, when most support ceases). There’s a “lead tenant” (although some organisations just call them “mentors”, but I call them both) who are volunteers that live there and are supposed to guide/mentor you to build independence. They are more like helpful roommates, rather than full on workers. Dinner, washing, dishes and the rest are all left up to resident.
Technically lead tenant is optional, although as soon as I brought it up, they’d already started packing my bags (metaphorically). What I meant from being forced to move before I was ready was essentially just the above. The first meeting I had with the lead tenant program leader was on the 14th of June, and on the 2nd meeting a week later I was told CP wanted me in there by the 14th of July. 3rd meeting, I was sick, and I couldn’t make it. I asked for an extension until at least the 1st of August, and they got back to me saying that the best they would do was the 24th of July. I didn’t end up seeing the house until a couple of weeks ago. It also wasn’t really about the date, more about my control over the situation being taken
Hope this helps, let me know if you had anymore questions
Thanks for the information! Hopefully it’ll be a positive place where you’re moving to, and you can get good support from the lead tenant. And of course, the DT never fails with life task info, if ever you need any!
I’m so excited for you!! I know it’s nerve wracking right now, but I can’t wait till you’re past the scary change, and you’re loving your new life. It’s gonna be fantastic 🖤
Today is shit. Everything is hard
💊 stool softener
🚽 🧻It took me waay to long in life to realise how clever the naming of Movicol© is.
🤣😭
You need to serve more fibre in breakfasts.
Stewed apple & prunes for all! Do add your plumber to emergency contacts.
🍪
I’m doing some of tomorrow’s cooking today. 12 home made naans and a big apricot layer cake. Tonight’s dinner is already done. Sometimes cooking mass quantities is a time and mind saver.
Yes it is. I do wish I still had my storage freezer.
Future me (who doesn’t like cooking) is always pleased when past me has done a batch cook, so it’s just reheat and go
