Sorry y’all, I just need to vent a little. I was unhappy with my previous barber and was trying out a new one. It was close by, had good reviews, and the same prices for men and women. Great. But man, my previous barber might not be the most skilled but at least she was quick and knew how to shut the fuck up. This guy took an hour(!) to do my really simple super short cut and talked the entire time. He fixed what I wanted to have fixed fine, but he doesn’t believe in clippers(?) so it’s way longer than I wanted, and I’m just exhausted. Honestly, my entire day has been ruined by the sheer amount of energy that has been sucked out of my soul from having a stranger talk to me for an hour straight for something that could’ve been done in silence in 20 minutes.

  • hth@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Lots of people see getting a haircut as a time to chat, and the longer the job the more it feels you’ve got your money’s worth. Not me, but lots of people look at it that way. I imagine that’s why your barber drew it out for an hour and talked the whole time. I hope you find a barber that gets you.

    • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      Yeah, I totally get that it meets a certain need for a lot of neurotypicals, that’s why so many barbers are like that. I’m happy for them it exists but damn it can be rough to find one who is more introvert/autistic friendly

    • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      I did that for a good while when I was really sick of having my hair cut, and I thought at the time I could get away with a buzzcut, but looking back on the photos… I really can’t. I’m stuck with barbers for now

  • Caboose12000@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    that sounds rough. just out of curiosity, what was wrong with your previous barber? a 20 min appt with no talking seems like a pretty sweet deal to me lol

    • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      It was a pretty cheap barber which was all I could afford then, but it also means they don’t take quality as seriously as more expensive barbers. I’ve had a disconnected undercut for years and they were always messy as hell with the lines but I used to have long hair that I mostly wore down so it wasn’t really that visible. Now that it’s really short you can see everything and it just looks messy and ugly. It’s such a shame because the 20 minutes in silence was really amazing.

  • mhz@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Can’t you be frank about it? like “sorry dude, nothing personal but I just want to mind my own business while having my hair done”, a little “thank you for respecting that” at the end with slightly extra tip and you will both become your favorite barber/client.

  • nichtsowichtig@feddit.de
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    1 year ago

    I let my hair grow for a couple of years, then shave it all of and donate my hair. helps me avoid that kind of problem :I

    I’m sorry, I hope you recover quickly :]

    • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      I wish I could let my hair grow out. I tried for 3 years because after I got medication that helps with overstimulation, I thought/hoped long hair wouldn’t bother me as much. Boy was I wrong.

      • constantokra@lemmy.one
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        1 year ago

        What bothers you about it? I keep mine in a tight bun at the base of my skull, held by a stick. It doesn’t move, get in my face, blow around… honestly, I could leave it in that bun for a few days before I have to redo it. I’ve had a buzzcut before, and honestly I think this is less of a sensory problem for me, because my head isn’t bare and I don’t feel wind or the hair moving around.

        • Mugmoor@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          1 year ago

          Periodic long-hair guy here. For me it’s when my hair falls in front of my eyes. It’s absolutely maddening, and almost always results in me shaving my head down super short.

          That and when you’re growing it out, there’s that awkward phase where it’s too long to stay in place, but too short to be tied up.

          • constantokra@lemmy.one
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            1 year ago

            Honestly, aside from a short period where I was required to have short hair, my hair’s been long. I only remember growing it out once, and it was curly enough it mostly staid out of my way.

            All I can say is if you stick it out once, you never have to get your hair cut again. The feel of those electric trimmers buzzing my neck… that alone should have been enough to diagnose me as autistic when I was a kid.

        • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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          1 year ago

          I’m especially sensitive in my neck, so when it’s long enough to reach, I feel and am annoyed by it constantly. Like 10 years ago when I was growing out my short hair too I also just put it in a bun, but I left it there for so long because I was so sick of it that I literally had dreads when I took it to it eventually. Had those for a while until they got too long. I also feel like it’s a bit silly to have long hair if you’re only ever gonna have it in a bun. Why not just cut it off then. Same end result but way easier. I guess technically long hair in a bun is better if you want the option to have it loose, but to me that’s way more hassle than it’s worth.

          • constantokra@lemmy.one
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            1 year ago

            Aside from thinking I look better with it long in a bun, I don’t like the feel of short hair, or the maintenance. My hair is curly, and it’s pretty difficult to manage short. I only have to wash my hair a couple times a week, and I haven’t cut it in years, except to trim the ends myself every few months. I run my fingers through it in the morning and then it usually goes into a bun. I don’t use shampoo either. If I get really dirty I use oatmeal bar soap, otherwise it’s just water or water and conditioner. If you stop using shampoo all the time your scalp stops producing so much oil.

            And if I want to spend the time to brush it and wear it down with a little bit of product in it, I get fabulous curls that never fail to get compliments. Then again, i’m a man, so compliment tier long hair is probably a lower bar than it would be for women.

  • BOMBS@lemmy.worldM
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    1 year ago

    I have found that barbershops where the barbers are obviously ex-convicts tend to be the best for me. They don’t talk unless they have to. There’s no “How was your day, hun?” or “Tell me about your life.”

    • SolarNialamide@lemmy.worldOP
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      1 year ago

      I love having my hair buzzed super short but unfortunately even my autism isn’t strong enough to not give a fuck about being a bald woman :(