you’re asking others to do something which is literally impossible (control how they feel about something) because you don’t want to do something that is literally trivially easy (slightly different word choice)

people can choose how they act, but not how they feel.

if the person that mattered most to you in the world died tomorrow, you couldn’t decide to just be happy about that. if you receive a thoughtful, lovely gift, you can’t choose to be frightened. if you’re comfortable and at ease, you can’t choose to be anxious.

if you want to be mean, i want that for you too. be mean, be an asshole, that’s fine. but stop lying to yourself.