Hey there, sorry if this isn’t the right community but none of the other ones I found seemed any more appropriate for this story, lol. Anyways, here goes:

A while back I got into watching Hot Ones, and I decided to try one of their more intense sauces, “Da Bomb”. I’m not generally much of a hot sauce guy, so I put in an order at an online store on the other side of the country. After it arrived, I had some fun sending videos to my friends of me suffering form tiny drops of it, as it’s quite intense! It claims to be 135,600 scovilles, but I have no reference point on what exactly qualifies as “hot”. We’ll just say it’s a lot.

Anyways, the problem with such a brutally hot sauce is that I didn’t really have much of a desire to actually use it. It’s really more of a conversation starter I show guests, but occasionally I remember about it and try a little just to remember how bad it is.

That’s how tonight started. My friends and I had just finished a few rounds of Counter-Strike and we were cooling off, when I had a desire to make myself the center of attention by tasting some more hot sauce. That was fun, and just a smudge on my thumb was enough to get me to grip the armrests of my chair, but it was soon over.

I suppose now would be a good time to mention something else my friends and I are involved in. Because of reasons, several of my friends and I have a group chat, to which we’ll occasionally send nudes. To be clear, we’re all het males and this isn’t for sexual gratification, it’s just a supportive environment where we can help build a positive body image. And also make dick jokes.

It then occurred to me that it had been a while since I had contributed an image or video. Separately, I also remembered that there was a meme going around a while ago about how a man’s testicles have taste buds in them, and an idea began to form in my mind.

I went to the bathroom, started recording, said a few funny lines, and then smeared some hot sauce on my balls. From my research online, I knew that although there are taste buds in testicles, they aren’t the same as the taste buds in your mouth and serve a different purpose. Based on this, I was confident that I wouldn’t feel any pain and had prepared some remarks to that effect.

Unfortunately, I completely forgot to consider that, taste buds or no, hot sauce is perfectly capable of irritating skin on its own. After about a minute, I started to get a very minor sense that something was off.

I watched the video back before sending it, and afterwards I started to notice some actual discomfort. I quickly got off (heh) another video to my friends about my new discovery, as the pain continued to slowly increase. A minute or two later, the pain had become quite noticeable.

Now, I’m not a guy who experience pain often, but I can certainly handle some amount of it (and by “it”, haha, well. let’s justr say. My peanits). After leaving the hot sauce on my balls a while longer, the pain was quite significant. In writing this story I’ve looked up some pain scales used by hospitals, and I’d estimate my pain at a 7 or 8 out of 10. I didn’t take any pain medication as I hoped to deal with the root cause of the pain before the medicine would kick in, but if I had anything that was fast-enough acting then I would have.

I had finally had enough, and as it’s rather difficult to wash your balls in the sink, I turned on the shower and stepped inside. I was immediately hit by an intense coughing fit, which I assume was caused by the steam carrying some of the sauce from my balls into my mouth and irritating my throat. These fits continued throughout the rest of my shower.

The next problem then presented itself. To wash off the hot sauce, I needed to rinse my balls. Unfortunately, rinsing my balls meant putting them directly in the stream of the shower and by this point my testicles had become quite tender, so the stream of water I needed to end my pain was itself painful.

After slowly scrubbing any traces of the hot sauce from my cock and balls with soap, I realized that I had been clenching my testicles (is kegel the right muscle here?) for some time and they were getting rather sore. I got out of the shower and onto the toilet so that I could fully relax and let the poison slowly work its way out of my system.

With the help of my phone to keep my mind off things, the pain slowly improved until I could manageably walk around, although my balls are still tender a couple hours later, even after writing all of this. The side of my testicles that I applied the hot sauce to was somewhat redder and noticeably swollen, but it’s continued to recover and I’m not concerned about any actual damage. I had a pee that felt strangely spicy, but not painful.

As for outcomes? I’m generally fairly vanilla, but I’m always curious about trying new things. My opinion is that if this is representative of CBT, then I’m not in any hurry to try again (although not knowing I was about to inflict CBT on myself certainly didn’t help matters).

A couple things to keep in mind if anyone decides to follow my example: Firstly, expect the pain to take as long to dissipate as it did to grow (i.e. a long time). Secondly, you probably shouldn’t do this with a partner (at least not one who isn’t very enthusiastic about trying). Traces of hot sauce will remain on skin until very properly washed, and anybody who interacts with you will get some on them as well.

P.S. Sorry for the lack of pictures, I didn’t think to take a normal picture in the moment and I’m not in any hurry to repeat the experience.