'90s

  • peaches@lemm.ee
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    1 day ago

    I was a teenager back then and I did not think it produced the best music. But I was not mainstream, I hated being like everyone else, as if we were robots. I made a point of going against the stream regarding aesthetics, religion and cultural stuff. I hate uniforms to this day. I don’t get the young these days dressing the same as the others. Is it an education thing? I mean, as a teenager you are looking for yourself, trying stuff to see what you like. Why would you just copy what everyone does?!

    • SmokeyDope@lemmy.world
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      12 hours ago

      Ironically the ‘nonconformist rebel who thinks themselves a more unique individual than their peers because they don’t listen to the same music/dress the same way/have a niche hyperobsession/ act antisocially’ is one of the most common and popular teenage archetypes.

      Using generic punk identity signifers like dyed hair and piercings and only being into underground non-mainstream artist to show your not like everyone else, only serves to indicate that you are in fact predictably generic in identity seeking like everyone else.

      So I guess my point is that maybe nothings changed about kids, its the same old same old. Most of them follow the trends and normalize to fit into tribal groups, the ones that don’t pride themselves on nonconformity while paradoxically adopting tribal markers to distinguish themselves as a group that conforms to nonconformity.

      • peaches@lemm.ee
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        12 hours ago

        News flash, we are all unique. People just do not embrace that, they are afraid to step outside the uniforms. And sometimes with good reasons, since society tends tu put down whoever is not like them. I did not give a shit about that. And I was very social, more so than now, so I don’t know where you get that analysis from. I also did not wear piercings, died hair and all that. I just did not want to have to buy some expensive clothes because they were fashionable and extremely uncomfortable many times. That did not impede me to make friends, but it did allow me to stand for myself and not conform to stupid norms. My parents taught me critical thinking, taught me to be responsible, and encouraged me to be happy in whichever form I had(and I was and am) and to fight for my rights and against bullying.

        • SmokeyDope@lemmy.world
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          11 hours ago

          I wasn’t referring to you specifically about wearing clothes and being antisocial. Those were just common personality and style examples i listed which ive subjectively experienced in my friends and others in my life who embraced the 'not like everyone else, im not into what everyone else is" mentality that went hard on trying to define themselves through hating what everyone else liked. I’m sorry to unintentially implicate you personally. Every time I read someones comments on the internet about priding themselves on not being like everyone because they only listen to unpopular music (its always the music for some reason) I think about how alike these people are to eachother and how that realization might piss them off if they ever saw it themselves.

          You are spot on, everyone is special and unique when examining their life experiences and particular mental complexity as a whole. However people also like to fall into behavioral archetypes, their sense of individuality is often based around arbitrary and shallow things (especially as a teenager) and most idealogical beliefs people think is their own was ultimately formulated by someone else centuries ago. A five paragraph twitter bio of all a persons yucks and yums is not the same thing as developing genuine individuality through life experience/breakthroughs in understanding yourself.

          • peaches@lemm.ee
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            11 hours ago

            Thank you for elaborating your idea. I understand now what you‘ve meant. I think for many people the teenage years are very difficult. I also had a short period of it thinking nobody loved me, which was not true at all! It is all the hormones and the changes. Luckily I got over it quickly.

            But a lot of people feel lost still into adulthood. I don’t have kids yet, but if I do, I would hope I would give my teenagers enough love so that they feel safe and accepted however they are, so that they can evolve into mentally healthy adults. I did an online master in education once, and the things I mostly got stuck with is that, parents should always hug and express their love for their children, even if the children get embarrassed, it is a phase, but they have to feel safe and loved in their homes, to be able to fight all their demons outside.

            Also a bonus thing I learnt: free time to get bored for children is essential, so that they have time to order their thoughts about the world and what they want from their life.