So I thought I had figured myself till now. But I was clearly wrong…

So the last few days have been incredibly confusing as I reflected on my gender identity. I’m definitely a boy, that’s for sure. I wouldn’t want to go by any pronouns except he/him. The they/she stuff simply isn’t me.

I don’t want to dress up in a feminine manner (I don’t think I would be comfortable in skirts and thigh highs and what not…). Like… I haven’t tried that yet, but I really doubt I would be much interested in it. I like my current wardrobe.

HOWEVER, I want a feminine-ish body. Like… not boobs or anything. I find boobs quite repulsive. BUT I would definitely love to have a more feminine butt/dick. I like tucking, WHILE loving my dick.

I hate body hair/facial hair. The only place that I like hair on is my head. And while my hair is long-ish, it isn’t girl-like long. Like… the intention is not to look like a girl.

I dunno, it’s weird I suppose… Here’s one way to put it. If estrogen didn’t give me boobs, I would LOVE to take it. I would love to have a higher voice, better head-hair, and a girlier butt and dick. BUT I would still identify as a male while being in male-like clothes.

What the hell am I? I’m definitely not trans. I don’t think I’m a femboy, as I would hate doing makeup/wearing skirts n stuff. I’m so confused.

Oh, and I’m gay if that’s relevant.

  • leetamus@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    What’s the significance in defining yourself this way? Why do you need to create a (pointless?) category? I don’t see how this impacts your life.

    • UraniumBlazer@lemm.eeOP
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      7 months ago

      Right now, I don’t have anyone to share this experience with. I know I’m not alone, but I can’t just find people like myself by repeating the post above over and over again, can I? That’s why categories exist, so that you can describe stuff in less words.

      • leetamus@lemmy.world
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        7 months ago

        You described a regular person who, like all people, has mental and physical preferences, some masculine and some feminine. We are all like you. If you need a category to describe that I’d say person is fitting.