Title and image source from this Mastodon toot by fatsam@mstdn.social. I even took the damn title because I couldn’t think of anything more apt.

As always, respect my trans homies or I make your pronouns was/were.

  • GeneralVincent@lemmy.world
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    8 months ago

    I think there are two similar but different points being made by both of yall

    The other commenter is referring to when a man is insulted by being called “not manly” which has the subtext of “feminine bad”

    And you’re seemingly talking about when someone is called masculine, but use subtext to insinuate that it’s a bad thing.

    Both can be hurtful to a man, and one is directly tied to sexism against women. I’d argue both are caused by biases pushed by patriarchal ideals. So similar ideas but a bit different

    • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
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      8 months ago

      I thought I was pretty clearly talking about society calling masculinity bad, so I don’t understand what prompted that response. Maybe I wasn’t clear enough.

      • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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        8 months ago

        His point is that “man bad” only happens because we did “women bad” for millennia. We spent so long hating on women that,to get to equality, we need to swing the other way for a bit.

        But rest assured, men are already very much valued in society. That’s why everything is tailored towards us and we make more money for doing the same shit. You probably don’t notice it though, because it’s just “how things are”.

        • Mouselemming@sh.itjust.works
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          8 months ago

          You got my point, and also exemplify it, by saying “his point.” We’re all guys here on Lemmy, right, that’s just how things are, eh? (Tbf, I landed in here from All. But that’s the sneaky thing about women: we’re everywhere!)

          • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            “there’s literally dozens of us!”

            But sorry about that. I’m still working on degendering my default speech.

        • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
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          8 months ago

          I don’t think we need to swing the other way. An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind.

          Can’t we just strive for equality?

          • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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            8 months ago

            No, and that’s very silly.

            Let’s lay someone slapped you in the face everyday for a week. Could you turn around and simply forgive? Not press charges, not yell at them, just simply forgive. I know I would struggle to do it. And that’s just my face for 7 days, not an entire lifetime of being pushed around.

            You’re expecting 50% of the population to have Jesus levels of forgiveness. That is very silly.

            • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
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              8 months ago

              It’s something to aspire to. I’m not demanding they forgive. I’m asking they try not to become the thing they hate.

              And for the record I don’t think we’re in much danger of that. Women are not in power in the world. The world is still mostly controlled by men, and most of the women who are in power don’t seem concerned with punishing men for the sins of their fathers.

              But it is a dangerous and toxic mindset for anyone to have.

              • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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                8 months ago

                Is it though? Is it dangerous for a rape victim to be like “men suck”? That doesn’t seem dangerous to me in any way. Just seems like a reasonable response to a hard life.

                That’d account for like 20% of all women if you give those people a pass.

                • Cryophilia@lemmy.world
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                  8 months ago

                  No raindrop believes it’s responsible for the flood. In aggregate, these viewpoints are dangerous. I remember seeing it happen in real time on the original red pill subreddit…must have been 10 years ago. For a long time, men would come there, men who had been hurt by women. For a while, there was balance, there was a community of men to help them work through their feelings of anger and resentment. But it became too much, there were just too many angry men, and we all know what happened to it.

                  • surewhynotlem@lemmy.world
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                    8 months ago

                    Hmm. Perhaps. Perhaps these opinions would go away if women stopped being hurt.

                    Don’t blame the swelling. It’s just a response to the infection.