I am listening, and what I’m hearing is that I, as an innocent person, am a source of terror for someone I’ve never met because of a fact of my biology that I have no control over. I have no ability to change the feelings of someone else, because no matter what, those feelings are only able to be changed by the person feeling them. I can say I’m innocent and not a threat until I’m blue in the face, I can act as non-threatening as I possibly can, I can leave women alone in public. None of that matters because I’m not the one with the power over those feelings.
No. You’re not a source of terror. But people don’t know that. They just see a man. The issue isn’t with you, it’s with common experiences women have had with men.
There are so many bears that don’t hurt humans. But humans carry bear spray just in case the one they encounter is dangerous.
The issue isn’t with you, it’s with common experiences women have had with men.
And that’s exactly the problem. I’m not those men. I have no intention of acting like those men. Yet I’m still scared that I’m going to get pepper sprayed anyway just for asking a woman for directions.
Unfortunately dangerous men don’t wear signs around their necks. They just look like normal dudes. It’s the false positive vs false negative. A false positive results in the woman walking away and maybe an awkward moment between two people. A false negative can result in being raped and/or murdered. That’s really what it boils down to. Women just want to stay safe.
That’s on you, pal. I don’t feel entitled to anything but the same basic respect I give anyone, man, woman, or otherwise. All I want is not to be looked at as an existential threat just for existing and I really don’t think that’s unreasonable.
You say you’re listening but all you’re hearing is how what is being said affects you.
You appear to see yourself as a victim. This makes you more dangerous than a bear.
The bear won’t take a women’s fear of it personally. It will want to avoid confrontation.
You will definitely take it personal. You appear willing to confront them for their fear. You will demand they not be afraid of you, because you are innocent. The scenario is one of a thousand reasons they choose the bear.
Are you fucked in the head? I am a man and I take no insult to this. In fact I agree, I would also rather be in the woods with a bear than with a random man. Imagine it differently for a second to maybe gain some perspective. Would you rather spend the night in the forest or in jail with the scariest ass don’t drop the soap motherfuckers and no guards? That’s basically what this question is like for women. A bear is generally just going to ignore you.
I am listening, and what I’m hearing is that I, as an innocent person, am a source of terror for someone I’ve never met because of a fact of my biology that I have no control over. I have no ability to change the feelings of someone else, because no matter what, those feelings are only able to be changed by the person feeling them. I can say I’m innocent and not a threat until I’m blue in the face, I can act as non-threatening as I possibly can, I can leave women alone in public. None of that matters because I’m not the one with the power over those feelings.
No. You’re not a source of terror. But people don’t know that. They just see a man. The issue isn’t with you, it’s with common experiences women have had with men.
There are so many bears that don’t hurt humans. But humans carry bear spray just in case the one they encounter is dangerous.
And that’s exactly the problem. I’m not those men. I have no intention of acting like those men. Yet I’m still scared that I’m going to get pepper sprayed anyway just for asking a woman for directions.
You’re afraid that a woman might pepper spray you if you scare her, while she’s afraid you’ll kill her if she upsets you.
Unfortunately dangerous men don’t wear signs around their necks. They just look like normal dudes. It’s the false positive vs false negative. A false positive results in the woman walking away and maybe an awkward moment between two people. A false negative can result in being raped and/or murdered. That’s really what it boils down to. Women just want to stay safe.
Buddy, you’re throwing off such strong “nice guy” vibes you’re squicking me out, and I’m a 50-something year old, hairy, straight dude!
That’s on you, pal. I don’t feel entitled to anything but the same basic respect I give anyone, man, woman, or otherwise. All I want is not to be looked at as an existential threat just for existing and I really don’t think that’s unreasonable.
You say you’re listening but all you’re hearing is how what is being said affects you.
You appear to see yourself as a victim. This makes you more dangerous than a bear.
The bear won’t take a women’s fear of it personally. It will want to avoid confrontation.
You will definitely take it personal. You appear willing to confront them for their fear. You will demand they not be afraid of you, because you are innocent. The scenario is one of a thousand reasons they choose the bear.
A bear isn’t trying to find a dating partner in a human woman…
You’re sick in the head if you think being depressed over being labelled an existential threat makes me dangerous.
Found the incel.
Feel better?
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Are you fucked in the head? I am a man and I take no insult to this. In fact I agree, I would also rather be in the woods with a bear than with a random man. Imagine it differently for a second to maybe gain some perspective. Would you rather spend the night in the forest or in jail with the scariest ass don’t drop the soap motherfuckers and no guards? That’s basically what this question is like for women. A bear is generally just going to ignore you.