We report what we want you to decide

Fair and Unbalanced

And absolutely nothing will happen

Probably icing up

You would struggle to find a body double, let alone one that could act.

Orders start shipping September 30th!

Reality has a well known bias for truth

And Phil Collins cameo’d as a police inspector

Pretty sure this is the norm. Did you sleep through Iraq and Afghanistan?

It’s not rogue. They’re doing exactly what everyone knew they would and nobody really cares because they’re killing brown people who believe in a different imaginary friend.

All those ‘good’ Christians standing beside him.

Going through this process now. It’s true. All of it.

During President Donald Trump’s administration

That’s a given.

I tried, but the combat was so janky. I just couldn’t.

It’s mostly a wealth transfer from dumbasses to a criminal grifter.

He probably won’t even show up on time.

I like to subscribe to the theory that “Behind every pretty person there is a SO sick of their shit.” It makes me thankful for what I have

It’s actually great. As the real Elon Musk I can hide behind anonymity of this false account.

Probably just permanently hard code it to the front page

Don’t forget hateful racists