Is Elon’s left shoe bigger? Did he order “what the President’s having”?

Except for the illegal from Africa

(No one is illegal. Your family crossed hundreds of borders without papers. Borders aren’t helping me. Especially if Musks are in the United States and 2Pac’s mom is not.)

Oh no — what happened?

Thank you. We see Americans out here complaining about their abusive relationships with their presidents but no one willing to leave our ultimate Abuser.

I have yet to say “meh” when children are raped or “meh” when I give them cancer. I should be running this bitch.

Are all paisleys fractals?

“How dare she not invite me to her wedding? I thought the BLT community was all about inclusion!” —someone to me, once, pretty much

It’s how I got my office an amazing deal on Arch Enterprise

In the end, all soup is chowder

Just how organic we talking here? Like a 7?

Also: these fucking self righteous insider knowing nods are all that kill me now that I’m all vaxxed up.

Genocide’s a dealbreaker but I encourage swingstaters to vote Harris

Thank you! 🙃😊

I don’t get it

I haven’t laughed so hard at a comment in I bit. I can hear you spitting this at me like.

I know a parent who has said essentially this. To two separate problems their child faced. It breaks me.

What’s the upside down Z-Library icon in the lower left for YT?

Dividing by zero

still makes more sense to me than a lower-number-means-warmer-temperature scale.

A lot of Christians are in an abusive relationship with one god that most humans don’t even believe exists. Do, say, children with cancer or natural disasters shake their faith? It seems to strengthen it. Idk.

Precrastination is when you get too far ahead on a group project because you’re avoiding another awfuller thing.

Nor archive.md nor archive.today, which appear to be run by the same rogue actors and serve the same content as archive.is and archive.ph. Beware.

Sometimes English feels like the lost-sock bin in an apartment building’s laundry room (yes, “kingly”, “regal”, “royal”, and “queenly” are almost synonyms), but I’m delighted to learn English borrowed “formic” along the way.