In the books, they didn’t understand we were individuals at first, and when they did they were horrified. They were never going to send a third wave, they wanted to find a way to communicate, but humanity just kept cutting a swath to the home world where all the queens lived.

By the final battle, they had managed to connect with Ender, but he was a warped child genius collapsing under the pressure. In the end, they basically accepted their fate out of guilt, and left a baby queen imprinted with their monitors hidden in stasis on one of the colony worlds they had taken