Funny enough, Hexbear actually defederated from my main instance first, due to it not being inclusive enough for their standards. My own experiences with Hexbear as an autistic enby are that Hexbear is actually the most inclusive Lemmy instance out there, by no small margin. The issue with Hexbear is that its users like to “punch up” at non-leftists, pointing out how people propagate or benefit from exploitative systems, and justify these systems to themselves.
Being “dunked on” may annoy and wound the pride of non-leftists, but this is also very much not the same as the actually evil Nazi shit posted to EH, which “punches down”. I have for many years understood the difference between being annoyed and having my pride wounded for having a bad opinion, and being actively terrorized and marginalized for being a member of a marginalized group. The world would be better off if more people understood that difference.
Hexbear at least has a no-tolerance policy for open slurs, as far as I’m aware. But you’re saying with regard to /r/CTH, that it wasn’t, like, people reclaiming slurs, or using “slurs” for non-marginalized groups – that it was actual, proper, undeniably hurtful slurring you saw? And by the way, what is a “dirtbag leftist”, anyway?
I can definitely understand being put off by the way that the Hexbears often talk. I have managed to have a lot of constructive conversations with the Hexbears, where they honestly just write normally and almost unfairly politely for my asininity; but when the Hexbears aren’t in Serious Mode, which is most of the time, then their comments just look like cryptic emojis and weird slang, right? And I think that’s appealing for a certain type of person, but not for others. I don’t think it’s necessarily bad to be childish or flippant, so it doesn’t bother me.
Whether the Hexbear culture is toxic is a different question. I can feel comfortable asking silly questions there or expressing sides of my identity that I might hide in other spaces, but there are also parts of the Hexbear culture that I like less and wish would change. Foremost that they could use a reminder of Hanlon’s razor sometimes.
What’s this about people disliking Tumblr due to slurs…? I haven’t heard about people particularly disliking Tumblr for any reason, much less usage of slurs. And I don’t know what FWR and AHS are, either. The second seems to be American Horror Story, but I’m not familiar with that.
I don’t particularly like 196, either. It was the mod endorsement of an ableist slur on 196 that was sort of the impetus for Hexbear defederating from Blåhaj, actually. So I’ve always wished that 196 would just move to its own instance instead of being basically this parasite on the rest of Blåhaj Lemmy where prejudices are allowed to flourish.
It’s only just now occurring to me that when you talk about slurs you might be referring more specifically to a word that alliterates “quest” and rhymes “near”, and maybe also a word that alliterates “bid” and rhymes “switch”. Are those the words you’re thinking of? The first in particular would be a word that an older gay person from a conservative region would probably have a traumatic past with, but that younger people in spaces like Blåhaj Lemmy or Hexbear or Tumblr would use without having that trauma. I could understand taking issue with that if that is your trauma, because that is something that people should be more respectful and aware of, and that younger LGBT+ people in particular could do better about.
Counterpoint: new users who don’t know the ins and outs of the fediverse might join an instance at random and see significantly less content.
Removed by mod
Funny enough, Hexbear actually defederated from my main instance first, due to it not being inclusive enough for their standards. My own experiences with Hexbear as an autistic enby are that Hexbear is actually the most inclusive Lemmy instance out there, by no small margin. The issue with Hexbear is that its users like to “punch up” at non-leftists, pointing out how people propagate or benefit from exploitative systems, and justify these systems to themselves.
Being “dunked on” may annoy and wound the pride of non-leftists, but this is also very much not the same as the actually evil Nazi shit posted to EH, which “punches down”. I have for many years understood the difference between being annoyed and having my pride wounded for having a bad opinion, and being actively terrorized and marginalized for being a member of a marginalized group. The world would be better off if more people understood that difference.
Removed by mod
Hexbear at least has a no-tolerance policy for open slurs, as far as I’m aware. But you’re saying with regard to /r/CTH, that it wasn’t, like, people reclaiming slurs, or using “slurs” for non-marginalized groups – that it was actual, proper, undeniably hurtful slurring you saw? And by the way, what is a “dirtbag leftist”, anyway?
I can definitely understand being put off by the way that the Hexbears often talk. I have managed to have a lot of constructive conversations with the Hexbears, where they honestly just write normally and almost unfairly politely for my asininity; but when the Hexbears aren’t in Serious Mode, which is most of the time, then their comments just look like cryptic emojis and weird slang, right? And I think that’s appealing for a certain type of person, but not for others. I don’t think it’s necessarily bad to be childish or flippant, so it doesn’t bother me.
Whether the Hexbear culture is toxic is a different question. I can feel comfortable asking silly questions there or expressing sides of my identity that I might hide in other spaces, but there are also parts of the Hexbear culture that I like less and wish would change. Foremost that they could use a reminder of Hanlon’s razor sometimes.
Removed by mod
What’s this about people disliking Tumblr due to slurs…? I haven’t heard about people particularly disliking Tumblr for any reason, much less usage of slurs. And I don’t know what FWR and AHS are, either. The second seems to be American Horror Story, but I’m not familiar with that.
I don’t particularly like 196, either. It was the mod endorsement of an ableist slur on 196 that was sort of the impetus for Hexbear defederating from Blåhaj, actually. So I’ve always wished that 196 would just move to its own instance instead of being basically this parasite on the rest of Blåhaj Lemmy where prejudices are allowed to flourish.
It’s only just now occurring to me that when you talk about slurs you might be referring more specifically to a word that alliterates “quest” and rhymes “near”, and maybe also a word that alliterates “bid” and rhymes “switch”. Are those the words you’re thinking of? The first in particular would be a word that an older gay person from a conservative region would probably have a traumatic past with, but that younger people in spaces like Blåhaj Lemmy or Hexbear or Tumblr would use without having that trauma. I could understand taking issue with that if that is your trauma, because that is something that people should be more respectful and aware of, and that younger LGBT+ people in particular could do better about.
I’m sorry to have touched a sore spot.
Counter counterpoint: the other option is to give your unique identifiable butthole print to zuck
But he promised those pics were just for him!