• Th4tGuyII@fedia.io
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    1 day ago

    Related to the previous posts bit, but I remember first seeing the Man vs. Bear memes.

    I’ll admit it was hard not to take it personally at first, because even if you agreed with the core of the message, it feels like you’re being lumped in with the worst of menkind for no good reason. That’s probably why the reaction was so toxic, because people just replied with their gut reaction, which was to take offence…

    But upon giving it a bit of thought, I realised that as a guy who’s lived in some dodgy areas, I think I too would oftentimes prefer to take my chances with a bear than alone with a stranger at night - not cause I think I’d beat the bear, but at least you know what the bear’s probably gonna do…

    And if I feel that way being a man, then considering (on average) women are weaker than men of the same build, I can see why women would feel that way too.

    • Lumelore (She/her)@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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      12 hours ago

      it feels like you are being lumped in with the worst of menkind for no good reason.

      Before I realized I was trans I also got super upset at being lumped in with bad men (although with an additional different reason that I didn’t understand at the time), and that feeling is absolutely terrible, because you’re basically getting shit on just for existing.

      From my perspective as a woman it seems like there are a lot of shitty dudes out there. After I realizing I’m trans it became a lot easier to notice misogyny since it now affects me. I did notice before, but when something affects you specifically you notice it a lot more. I also didn’t fully understand how weak women are compared to men until I started taking estrogen. Just being near a man I don’t know well or at all is very scary because of how easily he could overpower me.

      If I am getting a random bear vs a random man I would definitely take the bear just because I feel like the risk of getting a bad man is too high. If I could pick a specific man, I definitely would pick my father or a friend because I know they are good men and I feel safe around them.

      I think some outrage could have been avoided if the question was worded just a bit better, although I think part of why it got so popular is because of the outrage it caused.

    • spujb@lemmy.cafeOP
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      21 hours ago

      hell yeah dude. it’s an uncomfortable conclusion to draw, but it’s an uncomfortable reality we live in.